Imagine how much you have going on when you move house or start a new job. It’s stressful, right? Can you imagine doing both simultaneously and in a new country? It was crazy: Numerous buys from Ikea, remembering everyone’s names at work, numerous returns to Ikea, forgetting everyone’s names at work. Ahh!
I met an expat who said it took her around 18 months to fully settle once she moved abroad. 18 months!? It sounds like forever, but I can understand where she’s coming from.
Becoming familiar with your new city and getting to grips with things at work take place naturally in your every day life, but we agreed that the main thing slowing down the ‘settling’ process is making friends, making actual friends. This isn’t something I struggle with but I sometimes can’t help but think how easy it is to just pick up from where I left off with my life-long friends from home and not need to explain every single detail of an on-going situation for what should have been a two minute story.
You can trust that your secrets are safe with your friends from back home so why bother investing your trust in anyone else?
Every time I’m surrounded by new people, a chance to make friends or work closely with someone, trust is the main catalyst for developing a good friendships or working relationship. And I have realised that, for me, trusting people has played a big role in feeling settled since moving abroad.
Making friends can be a bit hit and miss but the ‘hits’ have been good ones, especially when I realise I am beginning to trust them and see how much of a difference this makes to feeling settled in my home abroad. It means that I can live all aspects of life whilst being abroad, not just selected parts.
When it comes to feeling settled, trust yourself to trust the people around you – it’ll make a huge difference.
It’s sad that your friend is moving away.
I wish her all the best
A very good read Alisa.
Rosalind xx
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Thanks 🙂 x
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